Shane Allison is a poet, writer, visual artist and dreamer who lives
in Tallahassee, Florida (USA). His new poetry collection, Sweet
Sweat is out from Hysterical Books. He is always at work on new
writing and art.
A Sestina for Jarret
Jarret, do you have a large velvet pad I could borrow
Or a gold gift box?
I need a round velvet bar,
Jarret and an acrylic earring stand.
Do you have a velvet apple ring case
Or a slot bracelet tray?
Jarret, right about now I could use a bangle bracelet tray
And a few round velvet pads if you have some I could borrow.
Do you have a 7 spool case
and a leather gift box?
I need a 9-bar earring stand
If you have one, or an acrylic round t-bar.
They say if I don't get them a round velvet t-bar
And a 12-slot bracelet tray
In 48 hours, I will be in a world of hurt. I need a black acrylic necklace stand
Too and a medium velvet pad to borrow
If that's okay with you. Can you put it in a white gift box?
Jarret, do you have a 3-sided revolving tray in an acrylic case?
I need a 3-shelf mirrored locking case
With a small acrylic round t-bar.
Do you have any silver gift boxes?
I need that and a 15-slot bracelet tray
If you have one on you. Do you have a small velvet pad I could borrow
Until I can get that 4-row acrylic earring stand
I was telling you about? If you have a 6-row acrylic earring stand,
I would be forever in your debt. I know you have an acrylic key ring case
Jarret. Do you have a mirrored necklace bracelet I could borrow?
Jarret, I need a ½ dome t-bar
And a 72 bracelet tray
For 72 or so emerald boxes.
I could use a few gold gift boxes.
They say they're going to cut off my hands if I don't get them the acrylic earring stand.
Jarret, I need a 20-slot bracelet tray
Or an acrylic 3-sided case
Or two. Did you get that round rose gold t-bar
I told you I need to borrow?
Jarret, they told me if I don't get them that
Velvet t-bar and a tray of gift boxes, it's curtains for me.
They want the 4-row case acrylic earring stand and they mean business.
The face of Aunt Norris
when she saw me hanging
flyers for a gay poetry group on a bulletin board.
The face of Uncle Weed
when he got the word from Aunt Norris
that I might be queer.
My face when he asked,
drunk off his ass, if I suck dick.
The face of Aunt Earline finding out the news from Uncle Weed,
who found out from Aunt Norris,
that the nephew who loves her jelly cake
more than life, likes men the way women do.
The face Auntee Alice made when it was whispered in her ear
by her daughter, my cousin, Chrissy,
that her nephew, the son of one of her brother's, is a punk.
The faces of cousin Melvet and cousin Toni,
who used to give me free chicken at Popeye's
and all the burgers I could eat from Burger King,
that the cousin she never sees is a fag.
The face of the twins, Kee-Kee and Kenny,
finding out from cousin Sean in a game of gin rummy,
about the rumor that the 'ham' of the family,
is a faggot.
The wrinkles of Auntee Mable's face stretched,
her husband's mouth, dropped open, when they got wind
of the latest familial scandal that their nephew,
the cousin to her daughters,
Tameka, Monique and Kim,
the second cousin to their children,
plays for the pink team.
The face of Leisha getting the call in Virginia.
The face of Duane hearing of it in Wakulla.
The faces of Ebony and J.R. putting two and two
Together after figuring out exactly which cousin, and being
none other than shocked beyond belief that I kiss and lie with men.
The face of my uncle they call 'Chicken Man,'
the brother to sisters, the brother to brothers,
the father to son and daughters, and the ex-husband to
the ex-wife in Woodville,
hearing that I am an all out abomination,
a sinner, a sodomite.
Litany for Jarret Keene
Jarret can I ask you a question?
Well more like a few questions.
Have you written any poems lately?
And if so, have you written any poems about pickles recently?
What about tighty-whities?
Do you have any poems about potted soil I could borrow?
Have you ever written poems about dry, cracked lips?
Jarret do you have any poems about chewing gum
Or cranberry-colored carpet cutters?
Jarret what about a poem about Lou Diamond Philips?
Got any Lou Diamond Philip poems or poems about Siamese cats?
Can you get me a moped for Christmas
With a poem about it taped to the exhaust pipe?
You got any Joyce Dewitt poems lying around?
Can I have a bite of your danish?
Could you write a poem about my taking a bite of your danish?
I could use a good platinum wig poem
And poems about nylon stockings and durags.
You got any poems like this anywhere in your possession?
Jarret when you write that poem about the chiliburger,
Can you copy a few copies for me?
Better yet, can I get some chili cheese fries
Wrapped in wide ruled notebook paper with a poem
About chili cheese fries written on it?
Remember those series of poems about Marilyn Manson
You said you were planning on writing?
Can I have one?
Jarret do you have any poems about hermaphrodites
Or poems about charbroiled chicken?
Or how about that poem you wrote about
Charbroiled-chicken eating hermaphrodites?
Do you still have that one?
Remember that bad dream you told me about, Jarret?
Did you write a poem about it?
Have you written any sonnets lately or a maybe a villanelle?
Can you write me a villanelle about pimple cream?
Would it be too much to ask, Jarret,
If you could write me a poem about Timothy Busfield?
Got any poems about radioactive urine in Rice Krispies?
Or if you have a poem or two about pissing in cereal,
That would be so neat.
Jarret can you do me a favor?
Can you possibly write a poem about this dead
Armadillo I saw in the road once?
I need a coconut poem.
I need a poem about pink elephants and pig feet
Pickled in pig feet juice, Jarret.
Do you think you can write them?
I need a hockey puck poem, a monkey wrench poem
And a poem about wax fruit.
Jarret do you know anyone who has written
Poems about Tammy Faye?
Do you think you can write a sonnet on Tammy Faye?
I need it by Thursday.
This poem you wrote about deep fried chicken fingers
I've been hearing so much about, can you fax it to me?
I might put an anthology of poems together about kiwi milkshakes.
Do you have anything that fits this theme?
You know what I need, Jarret?
I need a Dana Plato poem.
I need some poems about anal beads and shrimp forks.
Jarret can you write me a poem about dust mops?
Jarret I want you to write seventy or so poems
About cum in shag carpet in a purple van.
Think you can do that?
Can you write about my hemorrhoids?
Can you write something about that bad case of anal warts I had last year?
I need a poem about chopsticks and anti lock brakes.
I need a Beau Bridges poem.
I need that, and a poem written about Anne Bancroft eating peach cobbler.
Think you can handle that?
If you can, tell me about it in a poem.
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